Tuesday, November 13, 2012

How to create a vigilante: love loss for the law?

How strong is a camel's back?

Last night I knew something changed me, to be precise it was the morning, afternoon and then evening. I'm suffering from Post traumatic stress disorder, I've been holding on by my principles for six months now. I've remained in control up to a point.

I have realized that I was manic for almost five years. I do believe I had a form of mania derived from the loss of my own thyroid and now having to rely on medication to supplement the biggest and baddest hormone in your body didn't quite work out.

Mania is like drugs except it's internal. Depression and mania are siblings who bicker sometimes about the choices leading up to action.

Having now come falling from this tower which is high off the ground where others fear to look, I know that I was manic.

Confused yet? Try living it and figuring it all out.

I've been in this state of mind that isn't normal, but it's much milder than the sharp, cutting mania of the previous years.

After six months of this mild depression, with acute panic, I had a change of Hart.

I'm not going to tell you what I've done, but it's something I have to do. It's always hard to control, but I reached a point at a Chinese restaurant (no not the fortune cookie wisdom) where I know I have to do something about my current condition.

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